Green M&M's ain't got nothin' on me.

I am freezing. And just to make a point, I am typing in gloves. And it is not as hard as I thought it would be. They are white gloves… fuzzy ones. Oh, and fuzzy matching ear muffs. Not that it’s really that cold… like I said before, I am making a point.

I am craving sex. All the time. I cannot get enough sex. It’s almost ridiculous, how horny I am all the time. It must be the hormones… but I am always in the mood for passionate lovemaking. Casey, of course, doesn’t mind at all. But it might get a little old 9 weeks from now. There are certain looks that Casey will give me that get me so hot… I can hardy control myself.

Here’s the bonus… it helps the morning sickness. Nice, slow, gentle lovemaking makes me feel so much better. I feel great. So we do it all the time. Like sex-crazed teenagers… except not.

Seriously, it’s almost scary how horny I am. All the time. And yet, I think it could be sooooooooo much worse. I could be the opposite… and not make love for 3 months. How could someone LIVE like that?! Ridiculous. Absolutely RIDICULOUS. It makes me shudder to think.

Casey finds it incredibly sexy that I’m pregnant. It’s pretty amazing that there is something living and growing inside of me, right? Amazing. And sexy. Just wait until I start showing… there will be no controlling us. We won’t be able to stay off of each other.

You know, writing about it is really making it worse.

The little one’s new favourite food is fortune cookies. Yum yum… And still the whole peanut butter and bananas.

I CAN’T TAKE IT ANYMORE!!!!!!!!!!!

The 10-week Flu

I really hate being sick. I am sick of it. Funny, eh? I thought so. I found my subtle play on words amusing. Anyway, enough self-plugging What was I saying?

Sick. I am sick. I am sick with the “10-week Flu.” I hope it doesn’t last that long… I am praying that it doesn’t last longer. I just have to remind myself that this is a miracle. This is an amazing thing. I am carrying a life inside of me… that’s really cool! A life that was created by me and my husband, the man that I love more than anything. We created this little life together. Part me, Part Casey, All miracle.

Cravings are a strange thing. I used to get them when I was PMSing, and I thought they were bad… but those cravings are NOTHING compared to these. I cannot live without the things I crave now. And what it is that I crave differs from minute to minute. Peanut butter and bananas. [I hate both of those foods… and yet somehow, I can’t get enough.] Soft Pretzels. Apple pie. Brownies. Funnel cake. Potato chips. Ice cream. The list goes on. And until these cravings are satisfied, I can’t rest. And the food that I crave, baby Payne doesn’t care for. So it all makes me sick. I can hardly eat ANYTHING. And yet, I have to, or I will presently go INSANE. I just can’t win.

I think the little one is a boy. It just feels like he’s a boy. The peanut butter and bananas… totally a boy thing. Also, I am becoming more and more convinced that there could be 2 instead of 1. My symptoms are severe, and they started early… and there is a family history. Ideally, I want a little boy and a little girl. Boy-girl twins would be so perfect… Emerson Margaret would be the girl, and Ceron Broderick the boy. Twins… that’d be hard. But I think we can do it. In fact, I know it.

A note to Scout- If you are reading this, WHY HAVE YOU NOT CALLED ME?! Jeeeez, woman. You are so anti-social! –end note-

Did I mention that I’m married?

Oh the weather outside is frightful...

But my life is so delightful!!!

I was going to give some long winded excuse as to why I never blog anymore, but the real reason is that I'm lazy... and I had sort of forgotten about it. Not to mention nobody ever reads it... with the exception of Casey and Scout and sometimes other random people... so nobody had better be complaining. If I am wrong, leave me a comment! Sheesh! I feel like some recluse in her parents' basement.

Anyway, I will brief "you" on the current situation.

I AM MARRIED NOW!!! So from now on you must call me Mrs. Theodora Payne. [not really... that would totally ruin it.] But I am a wife now... I am so thrilled! Casey and I are married!

And now for the more controversial news... 

*deep breath*

I'm pregnant! Now before you go asking a bajillion questions and making a gazillion judgements or whatever, let me tell you the whole story. And then you may proceed to question me to death or rip me to shreds or feel guilty about drawing such quick conclusions... or whatever. Hahaha, do you ever write something and then have NO idea what you're talking about? That totally just happened.

I am pregnant with my first child... or children, as many insist I am having twins, or even triplets. And don't ask me how... because you all know how babies are made. And also, I don't know how. It is true that I was on birth control... I have been for years to... well, that is SO not important, and all of this is frankly WAY too much information. Anyway...

I am guessing that all this happened immediately after I got my casts off... since Casey and I immediately made love. Many times. Many amazing, beautiful times. Anywho... might have had something to do with the medications. Or maybe it was something like divine intervention. Who knows?

Anyway, due date is August 17th. I am hoping to have the baby on 8-8-08... because THAT IS SO COOL! And 8 is my lucky number. Wouldn't that be amazing? 

Oh, and I have 2 baby brothers! Michael Evan and Benjamin Casey. They are precious and amazing and adorable and I love them very much.

Wow, what other bits of exciting news can I throw out there?

Well, I'm being hit very hard with exhaustion... I think I had better go take a rest. 

Tu déconnes ou quoi?

Mas oui.

I guess I should update you on my current situation[al comedy]:

• I got my legs cut off and then reattached.
• I am 10 inches shorter, i.e. 5'7
• I am not dead or terminally ill any longer
• I had this thing called symbosteopetrosis.
• My legs were turning to stone, essentially.
• I am fine now, because they cut the crap outta my bones.
• I am in Nebraska.
• Legs in casts up to my hips, basically.
• No lovemaking for me.

And so, that is basically where we are at this point. But I will be ok soon. And now it is somewhat thanksgivingish.... so family is going to be here. 22 people. The first bit of my relatives arrived today. Their first words to me were, "Jesus Christ, Theodora... look at the size of your titties!" Thanks for that.

Boy do I LOVE holidays.

Etch-a-Sketch

So I found this etch-a-sketch in my pocket today... that sounds funny... but it was a miniature one. So I pull on my coat this morning and SURPRISE! Etch-a-Sketch! 

And that was the highlight of my day.

I am out of RENT with 3 broken toes... now lame is that? I cried and was furious and wanted to lay down and beg the earth to swallow me up... but it is not polite to make a spectacle of yourself in a doctor's office.

Casey and I are getting married next summer. It's decided. In Wales. In June... in the 20's somewhere. A family tradition.

June 21st- Maya & Tom

June 22nd- my great grandmother and grandfather

June 23rd- Mumsie and Popsicle

June 24th- David and Sarah

June 25th- CASEY AND THEO!

June 26th- Grandma and Grandpa

So the 25th it is. I hope that's alright with Casey... because that's when it's happening. Probably...

I feel like making a mess. Who's with me?!

My favourite colour is Velcro.

I have a new hobby: eating ice cream in the bath tub. I love bubble baths... especially when they involve Casey, ice cream, or both. Tonight I got both. And it was gooooooooooood.

I found this candy store today in the East Village... a few miles from my house... and it sells every flavour of PEZ you can imagine. I really like cherry and pineapple... raspberry is pretty good, so is mango. I have every flavour... because I was intrigued. I LOVE pez. it's amazing. Especially since I have a wonder woman dispenser. Too cool, right?

Yum, this Edy's Yogurt Blend vanilla ice cream is delicious!

I should mention that my great grandfather died. I should also mention that he was loaded. One of the only times I ever met the man was when he was re-drafting his will. He was fed up with everyone fighting about the money. I was sitting there playing with my little horses and being 6 years old and stuff... and he turns to me and says, "Why don't I just leave it all to you?" and I laugh and continue being six. Fast forward 12 years. He dies. And in his will, his fortune of £1,670,000 is left to... me. ME. Of ALL people. I finally know what he was talking about.

By the way... that's $3.4 million.

What the hell am I going to do with $3.4 million? You should have seen Casey's face. You should have heard the sound shout made. You should seen how freaked out I was.

HOLY CRAP.
I'm a multi-millionaire!

I feel Really Dumb, but...

I think I will fill out a surrrrrrrvey about me and my boy. Because I love him. That's why. Not to mention I can't sleep.

1. Who is your man?♥Casey
2. How long have you been together?♥ Since June 3rd
   
3. Dating/Engaged/Married?♥Engaged
4. How old is your man?♥21
5. What’s his middle name?♥ Roderic
   

You or your man♥

1. Who eats more?♥We both eat a lot.
   
2. Who says “I love you” first?♥ It depends. He says it a lot.
   
3. Who weighs more?♥Casey... I think?
   
4. Who sings better?♥Me. Sorry, boy.
   
5. Who’s Older?♥ Casey
6. Who’s smarter?♥ He's in law school... I was valedictorian... I'm not actually sure.
   
7. Who’s temper is worse?♥ Definitely mine.
   
8. Who does the laundry?♥ Me
9. Who does the dishes?♥ We do them together... we splash each other.
   
10. Who sleeps on the right side of the bed?♥ Does that mean the right side of the bed when you're looking at the bed or when you're lying in it looking up at the ceiling? I never have figured that out. So, if you're standing at the foot of the bed looking at it, I sleep on the right side.
11. Who’s feet are bigger?♥ That's about a tie. Probably his.
    
12. Who’s hair is longer?♥ Mine
13. Who’s better with the computer?♥ Possibly me.
14. Who mows the lawn?♥ What lawn?
    
15. Who pays the bills?♥ Me
16. Who cooks dinner?♥ Me, but sometimes he helps.
    
17. Who drives when you are together?♥ We drive our own cars. And now we take cabs everywhere.
    
18. Who pays when you go out to dinner?♥ Usually me... but he always insists.
    
19. Who’s the most stubborn?♥ Me
20. Who is the first one to admit when they’re wrong?♥ Certainly not me, I'm never wrong.
    
21. Who’s parents do you see more?♥ Mine.
22. Who named your dog?♥ I did.
    
23. Who kisses who first?♥It's a tie. We love to kiss.
    
24. Who asked who out?♥ I think he asked me out... but I was the one who knocked over the gatorade.
    
25. Who’s more sensitive?♥He is...
    
26. Who’s taller?♥ I am... by 4 inches.
    
27. Who has more friends?♥We share.
    
28. Who has more siblings?♥Well, I have more if you count 1/2 siblings.
    
29. Who wears the pants in the relationship?♥I do. Chyeah. Nah, it's not a matter of domination... unless it comes to poker. And then it's me.